Military marriages are no different from civilian marriages as the union can always be put to a test. Military spouses find it even more difficult once their husband is on active duty, deployed to face a dreadful mission. The anxiety, the worries and the longing, combine with having to put up a brave face in front of the children. Experiencing all of those all at the same time can be strenuous and stressful.
Not forgetting to mention that as wife of an enlisted man, she has an unspoken obligation to the military organization to keep the affairs of the home in order. The role is vital in ensuring that a deployed husband will not be distracted by family problems while in active duty.
Signs a Military Wife is Stressed Out with Her Domestic Role in the Military
Falling in love with an enlisted personnel is easy, as a man in uniform holds a lot of appeal. Add to that the security of having a home and environment in which a military couple can build their family. However, a military wife will soon learn that stresses of all kinds could present themselves to her, during times of togetherness with her military husband.
Problems of the division in which her husband is assigned can also be her problem, as her husband may come home too stressed out to perform is husbandly and fatherly duties. Often times, she will be put in a position where she is both father and mother, but rarely a wife who also needs affection and attention.
If in case her husband feels the urge to perform a sexual act, it will be just that; an action taken to release tension and not to express love and devotion. The worst instances are when the sexual drive comes when a military wife is herself, too tired or too physically spent. Her rejection or lack of enthusiasm and responsiveness, will bewilder a husband who expects more from her. In some other cases, both husband and wife are too caught up with their own set of troubles, sex becomes the least important thing in their lives.
The scenarios presented above are signs that marriage counselling must be sought while they are still together. That way, problems affecting their marriage can be threshed out before a husband receives a mission order.
Otherwise, her husband’s deployment becomes more of a reprieve for a military wife, who now sees sexual obligations as part of her to-do list. However, she will also start entertaining doubts about her husband’s fidelity, knowing fully well that a strain of some sort has affected their sexual relationship.
Even worse is when in her times of solitude, she begins having doubts on herself and her capability to endure marriage with a military man. After all, she can never tell if the temporary separation will help solve their problem or result in other developments that will make things worse.
Seek Counseling and Take Proactive Steps to Ensure the Survival of Your Marriage
In having awareness about the effects of stressful problems over your marriage, it would be wise for you and your husband to seek marriage counselling. At the same time, make efforts to communicate each other’s need for support and understanding. If necessary, rekindle romance by spending a weekend without the kids, to make sure both your attention will be focused only on each other.
You may even try the so called natural aphrodisiacs if lack of sexual drive is one of the issues you have to hurdle. Well if it does work, gather all information about all aphrodisiacs here, as you may need them to continue with whatever progress you made in improving the state of your marriage.